| so yeah, |
[Nov. 4th, 2008|07:58 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | Lillymoore | ] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  aggravated | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | my Kitty Purring | ] |
i haven't posted in a long time.
I bought a house.
and changed jobs.
I work A LOT more hours now. (it's sick)
but I need the hours for the money!ARG! |
|
|
| WTF man |
[Sep. 12th, 2007|06:56 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  crazy | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | flogging molly - whats left of the flag | ] |
you ever have those days where you have a fuckload of shit to get done at work... and you have so much on your head that when you get done, you have no idea what you did all day.
I have a lot on my head.
i have a crush on someone, and its soooooo deja vu that its not funny.
I can't even tell you how many times this has happened, i really like a guy, who is usually freshly single, or single or something, and I am usually good enough to sleep with, but nothing more, always the same."I'm not looking for a relationship yet, I really like you, and I want to , but I'm not ready to get into a relationship right now." and then usually within a few days they start dating someone, always with the same, "oh my god, I met this guy, he's sooo amazing, BLA...BLA...BLA..."
at least as far as I am aware this new one isn't dating anyone yet, but we keep having these "I met "insert whatever here.
I don't know whats going on, and thats all kindsa frustrating.
I even find myself trying to talk myself out of liking him, as if its some kind of self defense mechanism now.
I don't want to be used...
not again...
when the fuck did I become such a pussy? |
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|
| Crazy Ass Week! |
[Jul. 28th, 2007|09:27 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | My Own Apartment | ] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  tired | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Mike Doughty - Drunk on the Train to Chicago | ] |
so, yeah, last Saturday was beer in the streets day,
Sunday was Family Values
Tuesday was the visitation and Wednesday was the funeral for my little cousin Chad who got electrocuted.
and last night I went to my favorite boss's going away party.
in the course of an hour I had
two long islands
three shots of Patron
two red-headed sluts
and a mikes
so naturally today I woke up kinda hung over...
...just a little bit... |
|
|
| OMG |
[Mar. 23rd, 2007|11:58 pm] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | MC Lars - iGeneration | ] |
so like,
I shaved my head... and then I got hired.
I have a real job now...
like at a Major Pharma company.
I am in WAY over my head |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Sep. 23rd, 2006|10:50 am] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Sikl | ] |
I MISS MY ELLIE-NI-CHAN!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
|
|
| pardon me while I bitch |
[Jun. 6th, 2006|08:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | my own personal hell | ] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  like hurting myself | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Plastique Bertrand-Ca plane pour moi | ] |
so, lets recap shall we?
my roomate is an unemployed slob.
I'm Bipolar and definatly not having a manic week...
bullets taste like heaven or hell depending...
and in grand tradition I have been blown off by everyone again, although that doesn't surprise me.
recapping the conversation
them:yeah, we will be over when I get off work....
2 hours later i call back,
them: yeah, we just finished dinner, we will probably be over in a bit
me: thats cool, but I am dry at the moment and cant find anything...
the conversation drifts about random topics for a bit
me: so see you guys in a bit?
them: actually we dont know what we are doing tonight.
already suspected this, but nothing like being reminded that the people you think are your friends only like you because you get them high, and as soon as you cant do that they don;t want anything to do with you. |
|
|
| 26 |
[Apr. 20th, 2006|08:30 pm] |
someone very important to me once told me that the greatest thing I would ever learn is just to love and be loved in return...
granted, he ripped it off from moulin rouge, but the message was from him regardless.
Years later I understand what he ment... only when it was too late to appreciate his secondhand wisdom.
and in return, 7 plagerized words to the only man I have ever loved, since he will never see them....
"simply being loved is more than enough..." |
|
|
| after a week of sobriety |
[Apr. 7th, 2006|09:00 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | my own personal hell | ] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  sick | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Reel Big Fish - Where have you been | ] |
havent updated in a while...
catching you up on events
My grandpa died. He was more of a father to me than my dad was. He taught me how to cook, how to fish, how to hunt, and how to farm. he was the most whiley old coot that I have ever come across, and he didn't take shit from anyone... kinda my role model.
And that sucked. And in death he managed to do something that he hadn't been able to do for the last 12 years of his life... get my dad and my sister in the same room. So much drama.
and then to top it off... I catch Pneumonia.
so yeah.
and as if that wasn't enough we are now at day 6 of complete sobriety...
welcome back to that dark scary place in my mind.
Its times like this that I realize that it doesn't matter how talented or smart or funny or charming you are. The currency in the gay world is a perfect body, and a beutiful face. And I am tired of being broke.
if anyone wants to shoot me.... go ahaid, but give me warning, so that I can stand still for you. |
|
|
| update |
[Mar. 1st, 2006|04:50 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| | bitchy | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Bloodhound Gang - Along Comes Mary | ] |
Havent posted or updated in a while, but i have a reason... I have a life
between work and freelancing I have like no time
as for the love life I am back to my usual situation, I credit this to being buisy and placing faith in those who don't deserve it... foodstamps, looking in your general direction!
as as for work I lose my office friday.. some stupid thing about the head of the department having a cubicle and the temp having an office... whatever! |
|
|
| yeah |
[Feb. 15th, 2006|07:55 pm] |
so, I got another freelance animation job... and yeah... aparently animators get paid a lot.... (freaking)....like a LOT!!!!
like $500 as a retainer...
...Did I mention that I am freaking out? |
|
|
| FYI |
[Feb. 8th, 2006|05:41 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  dorky | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | The Sun - It must be you | ] |
So, I posted this on myspace, so I figured I should post it here too as an explanation of sorts....
The Whole Gingerbread Monkey Thing
ok so, it all started out (Completely clean and sober oddly enough) with my friend ethan and I driving to sterling to hang out at the coffee house where we used to hang before it burned to the ground, ANYWAY
we were making the trip in my old Audi, which for those of you who actually rode in it can attest was quite the deathtrap. Well, at the point, the radio had not yet been ripped out of it, so we were listening to a casset that we had recorded earlier from a cd, which is what you had to do back in those days
SO.... It just so happened to be Marilyn Manson's Portrait of an American Family. Which despite Mansons personal hatred, I believed it to be his best album ever...
Well, twards the end of the album there is a song called my monkey, in which there are the lyrics, "I had a little monkey, I took him to the country, & fed him on gingerbread, Along came a Cho-Cho, Knocked my monkey Coo-Coo, and now my Monkeys Dead"
While listening to the song we had the conversation about how this album rocked, and honestly most of the pop crap of the time could have used a lesson from this album, like, "all a song really needs to be cool is gingerbread, and Monkeys...."
Later having returned home from our trip I decided to write a short story about the events of the night in my usual deranged manner (based mainly on Academic Team Away Meets-go keiko and the towel chicken {rock on})
The Story was called "The Gingerbread Monkey's Journey, or Why Iowa Sucks Ass." The story was sort of a Fairy Tail... It was odd, but well recieved. So well recieved that I went on to tell more Stories of the Adventures of The Gingerbread Monkey, and Pika-Squeeg (now the Creation of his name is a much more interesting story)
so yeah, that is where I got the Gingerbread Monkey Screenname from, and I have had it ever since... |
|
|
| Miscellaneous Wierdness |
[Feb. 3rd, 2006|06:52 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  Like Cigarettes and Coffee | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | American Express - Find a new way | ] |
so yeah, turns out foodstamps is like a freaky yin to brandons yang, would be amazing, but the question is do I really wanna go there?
regardless, I am having gay boyfriend nite with manda, already bought some VERY nice chocolates, and some AWESOME chicken. Now all I need is a Dry red wine... and some massage oil, and it will be my basic faghag date... seriously, I rock... I need to find like a sexy version of me...to rape |
|
|
| confused and a little horny |
[Jan. 28th, 2006|01:37 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  horny | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | JSRF - Teknopathetic | ] |
so yeah, about my old job... hung out with one of the two guys I considered Eye candy.... turns out the brandon guy is really homophobic.... but i found this out from foodstamps.. the other piece of eyecandy
I hung out with him for a while
i eventually accidentaly came out to his wife first
she was cool, and i was all, dont tell jon, he doesn't know...
later she talked to him and was all oh my god, aarons gay, this rocks, now i have someone to talk too!
did you know?
turns out that he was also in strait drag at work because before he met his wife he was pretty gay...
then while all this was coming out he was having a few beers
later i was driving to my old roomates to pick up some chicken, and yeah, not sure if he was drunk, but the conversation on the way to palatine was pretty much him posturing about how he is loud and rough... and 10 inches, and how like he liked me a lot, and like if he wasn't with his girl he would totally fuck me in half, to me replying whatever, i would break you, to which he went on about how rough he is... then about how he will get fucked too for the right guy... and how he is the best at sex, and he is a freak... and all that stuff
then i go into collins, and like when i come out
he is all quite for most of the ride home, and like when we get back to crystal lake, he is all, when are we gonna get there, why are we in crystal lake! how long have we been driving, and i am like relax, were almost home, and he goes on to say about how he like blacked out for the past few hours....
so yeah
what about that?
huh!!!!
yeah, i am confused too....... |
|
|
| so yeah |
[Jan. 28th, 2006|01:02 am] |
| [ | I feel... |
| | morose | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | sum 41 - Pieces | ] |
I'm worthless
thought the guy I liked was using me for sex, turns out he is just using me for pot, and sex is just the unpleasentness that he puts up with in order to get high.
Granted this isn't quite on par with the three guys that killed themselves after sex with me, but it is kindof a kick in the head.
seriously whats wrong with me? |
|
|
| (no subject) |
[Jan. 25th, 2006|06:50 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| | dorky | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Alanis Morissette - 8 easy steps | ] |
Yay!!!! I have my computer back!!!!!!!
and its all upgraded and shit...huzzah!!!!
I now have a harddrive just for music... and its pretty full already, lol! |
|
|
| sooo yeah..... |
[Jan. 22nd, 2006|10:53 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| | aggravated | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | pink - God is a DJ | ] |
so as I sit here picking pubic hair from my teeth, I cant help but wonder.... how come i keep inviting "top only's" over, when I have an almost superhuman ability to turn tops into bottoms.
Just had a big butch black cop who swore he was a top only... fucked me for a few minutes... then he wanted me to suck his cock....
and before he knew what was going on I had him on his back wimpering as I plowed him. Granted, fucking a cop was fun, but I wanted to get MY knees bent...lol
so after I came I felt it was only fair to return the favor....
so as I am sitting there sucking on his balls I hear my friend elise in the back of my head, "If you want to get him off quick, all you have to do is stick your finger in his ass.... IT IS NOT NASTY.....and you can be home in 10 minutes watching Allie Mcbeal"
I also have the wierdest thoughts running though my head while I gum someone's junk....
how many cigarettes do i have left?
do I need to get more milk?
I need to wash my sheets.
how long has that crack been in the wall?
what am i going to cook for dinner?
and finally... god this guy has hairy balls! |
|
|
| Boned Sideways |
[Jan. 22nd, 2006|06:15 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  blah | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Kylie Minogue - Giving you up | ] |
bored bored bored bored
been all distracted from my journal by myspace.... damn its addictive.should get my computer back soon, this whole not having my own pc thing sucks hardcore.... going into gay porn withdrawl....
KOMOWAHARU OTAKU!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
|
|
| bored |
[Jan. 15th, 2006|06:27 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  wood chipper | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | orgy - blue monday | ] |
so I start a new job in data processing tomorrow...
thats right, I passed my orientation, thats right, ate the pussy while pointing northwest...lol
and started knitting a new hat last night... its supposed to be the blue hills hat... but the pattern is confusing, so i am just looking at the picture and freeforming it... its actually coming along nicely, so, here is hoping! |
|
|
| I got a job..... sortof... |
[Jan. 11th, 2006|08:38 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| |  DDR SKELETON! | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | Soil - Halo | ] |
so, yeah, i passed my drug test, and my vision test... as well as two english and two math tests
so i think i got myself a new job.... still have to wait for express to call me and tell me when i go in for orientation.... cause i cant figure out which way north is....
the joke last night was: ok, for your orientation test we need you to eat the pussy, while pointing southwest! |
|
|
| grrrr |
[Jan. 10th, 2006|07:55 pm] |
| [ | I feel... |
| | annoyed | ] |
| [ | I'm Jammin out to |
| | the Hazzards - Girl beer | ] |
I need a new video card for my computer... now I am stuck using my roomates computer, which limits me checking my email, and blogging...
still unemployed, got to go into cardinal today and take standardized testing... so with any luck I could be peeing in a cup in a couple of days and working shortly after...I hope |
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